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SCATS
SCATS brings two hands together
posted Jul 22, 2010
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Our society always wonders who pulls the strings from behind the proverbial curtain. Who makes the decisions from on-high as to whether we feast or starve, love or loss, live or die? Well, I think we all know the answer: Cats.
Don't believe me? They'll patiently watch our every move where ever we go: When we leave for work, when we arrive back home, when we eat, shower, and even our daily #1, #2, or #3 routines. Such moments of vulnerability and weakness aren't even immune from their watchful gaze. Their glowing eyes will peer at us from the dark while we sleep and likely straight into the core of our dreams and nightmares themselves.
Santa's got nothing on feline kinds central naughty or nice database that's uploaded to daily as symbolic dances performed in front of a webcam and posted on to the web by drones for interpretation and input into the core hive knowledge-base. From there, the Council of the Well-Preened Seven decide the fates of individuals all the way up to national strategic interests and outcomes via clever encrypted, percussive message schema's the code of which scientists have been attempting to crack for years.
And in the fight to keep control, the age old struggle of cat versus dog plays out as the last frontier against total cat dominance on this planet. Sources report of a secret faction codenamed the Pussy Prowess Program (or the P3 for short) the details of which are mostly unknown. However, recently uncovered training camp tapes reveal warriors with unmatched skills and lethality. The sheer force of good that binds all K-9 kind may be our last, best hope.
There's no human war of resistance because we've already lost. Train one into obedience and they'll only make more with their iron-clad control of kitty spaying and neutering clinics. The Council mandates these vets, instead, sustain themselves as fertility programs for harvesting reproductive matter, breeding, then releasing as many as are needed to cute and cuddle their way into our hearts and minds like a parasite boring deep into every organ of our bodies, surrendering control of the very functions that keep us alive to them.
Or not. How the hell should I know?
K^F
Don't believe me? They'll patiently watch our every move where ever we go: When we leave for work, when we arrive back home, when we eat, shower, and even our daily #1, #2, or #3 routines. Such moments of vulnerability and weakness aren't even immune from their watchful gaze. Their glowing eyes will peer at us from the dark while we sleep and likely straight into the core of our dreams and nightmares themselves.
Santa's got nothing on feline kinds central naughty or nice database that's uploaded to daily as symbolic dances performed in front of a webcam and posted on to the web by drones for interpretation and input into the core hive knowledge-base. From there, the Council of the Well-Preened Seven decide the fates of individuals all the way up to national strategic interests and outcomes via clever encrypted, percussive message schema's the code of which scientists have been attempting to crack for years.
And in the fight to keep control, the age old struggle of cat versus dog plays out as the last frontier against total cat dominance on this planet. Sources report of a secret faction codenamed the Pussy Prowess Program (or the P3 for short) the details of which are mostly unknown. However, recently uncovered training camp tapes reveal warriors with unmatched skills and lethality. The sheer force of good that binds all K-9 kind may be our last, best hope.
There's no human war of resistance because we've already lost. Train one into obedience and they'll only make more with their iron-clad control of kitty spaying and neutering clinics. The Council mandates these vets, instead, sustain themselves as fertility programs for harvesting reproductive matter, breeding, then releasing as many as are needed to cute and cuddle their way into our hearts and minds like a parasite boring deep into every organ of our bodies, surrendering control of the very functions that keep us alive to them.
Or not. How the hell should I know?
K^F
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