Beantown


Elect Filmore Jowels, Whig Party

VOTE WHIG OR DIE
posted Feb 22, 2012
Our Best Chance to Save the Republic!
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Announcing his '12 election year candidacy, the leading political powerhouse in the Beantown universe: Filmore Jowels.
Filmore has appeared previously in Beantown, notably HERE.

Vote Whig this November!
Remember the slogan: "Lesser of the Evils"

Check out his page on Facebook!
HERE

by NineInchNachos on 2/22/2012 @ 10:24am
what about his superpac   Golden Harvest Our Future Freedom For America ?

by Thorax O'Tool on 2/22/2012 @ 10:40am
What is that from?


by Thorax O'Tool on 2/22/2012 @ 10:56am
From Jowels' facebook page:

"It is in the darkest of times for this, The Republic that I hereby cast my hat into the ring.

In the inner-boroughs of our alabaster cities, the destitute find
neither shelter nor food; the able-bodied lack not from want of work.
Naye, they suffer from the lack of meaningful employment as it does not
exist.
A nation is only as strong as soft-spot in the chain-mail of it's armor; and it is in these times that the economy of the Republic.

Unlike the men who vie for the honor of the Republic's highest office, I
have in my years of statesmanship have learned that only a free
populace of men and women who oppose tyranny can fully govern themselves
and together work to build a nation.
Spread ye the word! Mine economic plan to lift the Republic out of this depressionary time is thus:

A chicken in every pot; a pillow on every bed; a gun in the hand of every child."




by NineInchNachos on 2/22/2012 @ 11:01am
but what are his views about birthcontrol for lady beans?   

by Thorax O'Tool on 2/22/2012 @ 11:06am
Filmore Jowels has no official policy on it.

Given that, I'd wager that Jowels really doesn't care what one does in the privacy of their home as long as it isn't supporting the British Empire.



by NineInchNachos on 2/22/2012 @ 1:24pm
FART THE QUEEN! 

by Thorax O'Tool on 2/22/2012 @ 1:50pm
Indeed.

One of the things Jowels supports is colonizing Great Britain. It's under the "Revenge will be sweet" section of his Foreign Policy.



by The Jinxmedic on 2/22/2012 @ 2:31pm
Because independence from the commonwealth has worked out oh so well for us...

by Thorax O'Tool on 2/22/2012 @ 6:17pm
It's never been about how well something works. It's entirely about what one's backers want.
And after that pesky war of 1812, can you blame Jowels' backers for wanting nothing to do with the brits?

Although, I have some reservations about F.O. Jowels and has party. They have awfully close ties and alliances with the Prussians.



by Maria on 2/22/2012 @ 6:53pm
"A chicken in every pot; a pillow on every bed; a gun in the hand of every child."


I'm really glad this isn't "A bean in every pot" because that would just be awkward.

Mine opinion is that Filmore Jowels is a fine and distinguished personage.

by Non Sequitur on 2/23/2012 @ 7:41pm
I bet Jowels would build a nation-wide light rail as long as it wasn't used to transport British imports or Redcoats.